Anatomy of a Tragedy

Lately I've been thinking about a tragic death that occurred nearly two years ago. Once I explain what happened, I'll tell you why it has been on my mind as of late. Nearly two years ago, a young man passed away from a drug overdose. He wasn't even 25 years old. Sadly, it isn't an uncommon occurrence.

While I can't say that I ever considered him a friend, he was much more than just a simple acquaintance. We grew up together, and we had more in common that I ever realized. He was a year younger than me, and his sister was a year old than me. His parents were good friends with my aunt and uncle, as well as my parents.

His older sister and my older cousin were good friends once, and our three families took a few vacations together. It was during these vacations that I grew to know him as a boy who loved anything to do with racing (all types) and snowmobiles. We were both the type to kind of disappear into the backgrounds of these group vacations.

During school, we never really talked or spent time together, although I do remember him as someone who always felt that he had something to prove. You see, he was a very short man. Throughout high school, he was not much taller than me if at all. I'd be surprised if he was five foot five inches when finished growing. Both of his parents were short and as silly as it seems, whenever I felt sorry for myself for being so short (five foot even), I would think of him. No matter how bad short women may have it in our society, short men have it much worse.

I'm ashamed to say this, but after I graduated from high school, I really didn't think about him at all until I learned that he had passed away. While I have experienced my share of death over the last few years, nothing prepared me for this. I just kept asking myself "Why did this have to happen?" I couldn't even bring myself to go to the funeral.

Later, I saw his Mom at another funeral, and she just gave me a great big hug. Undoubtedly, she was thinking of better days when her children where still that - children. Close to a year after seeing her at the funeral, I saw both of his parents at my cousin's wedding. It was the first time I saw the family since the tragedy. While outwardly it may have appeared that they were having a good time, I couldn't help but wonder what was going through their minds. I couldn't help but think that they would never get to see their son marry or have children.

As of late, I've talked a lot about men and short stature on this site, but I have yet to discuss the two issues together. There is certainly a part of me that wonders if this young man turned to drugs, at least in part, due to a sense of inadequacy as a result of his stature. I learned from his obituary that he was pursuing three separate bachelors degrees. As a woman who obtained two, it isn't something that is done without having something to prove, even if you are just trying to prove something to yourself.

I'll be posting more on these issues soon as I've come across some additional information on growth hormone. It appears that growth hormone is a hot topic right now. It is becoming another example of why the federal government needs to quit sticking its nose everywhere.

Lindsey

Men in the Classroom

This topic has really come to forefront as of late, and below are a few good discussions on the topic. I have to admit that I made my own faux pas today.

You see, in highlighting Right on the Left Coast: Views From a Conservative Teacher, I mistakingly thought that the author was a woman. What bothers me is that I had no reason to believe this. Indeed, the name of the contributor, Darrell, was right in the left-hand corner. My only explanation is the societal expectation that most teachers are women.

Remember how I mentioned the teaching tradition in my family going back several generations? As you would expect, it mostly includes women; however, I have a few uncles and cousins who are in education. Also, my Dad was a substitute teacher at one time. However, the actual percentage of male versus female teachers in my family reflects the national trend. Actually, it is my Dad's experience as a substitute teacher back in the late 1980s and early 1990s that really brought home the issues broached in the articles below.

There is a lot more that I want to say on the subject as it relates how our society treats men theses days (I only scratched the surface here). If we aren't careful, the next generation of men will not be so highly educated, and that is a tragedy. Some of the best high school teachers I had growing up were men.

Right on the Left Coast: Views From a Conservative Teacher: Men In The Classroom
Dr. Helen: Percentage of Male Teachers Hits 40-Year Low

Lindsey

Male Bashing - The New American Sport?

Pajamas Media: Ask Dr. Helen: Is Male Bashing Curable?

The article above highlights a disturbing trend that gets much discussion at my house. Let's face it: we don't treat men in our society with decency and respect. Somewhere along the line, it became trendy to ascribe all of society's ills to men.

For the most part, men have ignored it best they can and have turned to their own affairs. However, when you do have an opportunity to truly discuss things with the men in your life, you will soon discover that there are some real concerns there.

I've never understood why people of all sexes, races, religions, and nationalities couldn't simply treat each other with basic human dignity. I'm sure I'm not alone in that thought. It saddens me to see children not treat their fathers with respect, to see fathers becoming more alienated from their families, and to see men fall behind (there are now less men pursuing college degrees than women).

In some ways these concerns are overblown, but it doesn't mean that it isn't an issue. I know all too many women who expect everything to be handed to them and then disrespect the men in their lives. I know how the men in my life have been treated, and I don't always like what I see.

Lindsey